Greetings beautiful people
A couple of years ago, a friend of mine was getting married and I felt that our relationship warranted me a place in her wedding. This story is longer, but for the purpose of this blog, I’ll get to the point. Where was I? Oh yeah! So, I felt because of where I saw our relationship(my friend and myself), that I should have some place in her wedding. Being someone who typically speaks his mind, I expressed this to her, in a very calm and respectful way. We discussed it, and she put situation in a perspective that made me snap out of it and see the light. All was good. …nope!
She was pissed. She didn’t speak to me for a few weeks, wrote a blog about our conversation, and discussed it with our close friends.
Hmmmm…. being of sound mind and body, I simply wanted to rectify the situation, which though a heartfelt discussion, happened. But, that situation taught me a few things about expectations in no particular order.
1. Never feel privy to be involved in any aspect of someone’s life. I mean who the fuck was I to say that to her? The only person’s whose life I should be involved in every aspect of, is my own.
2. Honestly isn’t always the best policy. Sometimes a smile and lie, can keep the peace.
3. While I feel marriage is a great thing, I just don’t like weddings. I actually see them just a taxing as funerals and constipation. I don’t like the ceremony, the speeches, the church, and on average the attire of the wedding party.
4. Getting married and having kid’s changes things. Now mind you, I am not married and have yet to spawn a single child! Yet everyone I know who has either partaken in one or both of the previously mentioned activities must change.
I see the change in most cases for the best. If you haven’t changed and you have children, I’d probably give you the side if I saw you at the bar all the time. Also if you’re a newlywed, why the fuck are you always hanging around me? Lol….kidding. No, I know people should balance out their lives, but note that these things take precedence and it’s important for married couples, parents, and friends to acknowledge this.
Everyone I know who has gotten married, either becomes isolationists, typically hangs out with only other married couples, or maybe large groups (which usually is made up of other married couples). There might be enough non married people present for the married couples to not feel too domesticated. Oh yeah, and people with children only talk about their children, and constantly post pictures and word comments of/for their children.
I know there are exceptions to every rule, but I seldom meet them. This blog isn’t to hate on the institution of marriage or having children. I actually support these endeavors and wish the best for everyone. Yet this blog is for the non married people who may feel some kind of way about that life. If you weren’t invited to someone’s wedding….fuck it! That’s money you’ve saved on a gift and hours that you can use doing something productive towards your own life. If you’re not in someone’s wedding, fuck it! That’s money you’ve saved on a dress or tux.
I now look at other folks marriages as their marriages, not mine! I wish them all the best. Good luck, be happy etc etc. I will continue to live my non co-dependent, grown up life, with my significant other, just as happy!