2013 MTV Video Music Awards quick review

MTV-Logo

Greetings beautiful people

I hope this message finds you well and in good spirits.  I wanted to write some blogs about superficial things, that I dig or detest.  Yet in these artistically watered down terribly uninteresting times I live in, where does one draw inspiration?  Praise sweet baby Dejesus!  The answer arrived via divine intervention, or as a perk provided by my over price cable provider.

Thanks to the good people at Clear channel, I now have the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards as the muse for such unimportant commentary.

After years of cheesy colorful over the top and underwhelming productions, MTV finally delivered a great show.   I thought it was one of the best entertainment events in recent years.  The performers all delivered (good or bad)!  They committed to the moments and I loved it.

I found the show to be very heavy on the hip hop/R & B influenced side and that didn’t bother me,,,at least not as much that guy from “One Direction’s” skinny jeans did.  The 2013 MTV Music Awards actually read as a great concert interrupted by giving horribly untalented people awards (Selena Gomez and One Direction).

So here are my little tidbits on the performances and other showings that I can remember.  If I forget something, I’ll just consider it a happy side effect of the mescaline.

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Laday GaGa:

 I didn’t like this song before this performance, but now I’m all about it!  I just can’t resist a woman who wears a Kazimir Malevich “White Square” one minute and then a seashell bra with plankton panties the next.

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Miley Cirus, Robin Thicke,……(long pause) and 2 Chainz:

2 Chainz with choreography was a good idea, because I could always use a good distraction from that guy.

Robin Thicke…hmmm.  He looked like his dad, Alan Thicke, with the same suite Wiz Khalifa wore to the grammy’s.   and by the “same suite” I mean the same size too.  Dude!  You’re too grown to look like a Batman villain.

Miley Cirus.  I’ve heard all the hate about her performance, but I think it was great.

She can actually sing, and her commitment to being ratchet is admirable.  So what she has the body of a 15-year-old boy, whose testicles haven’t descended.  So what she thinks it’s cool to have thick sistas, and dancing teddy bears on stage.  I draw “Tittie Bears”, so who am I to judge?  Yet when she randomly twerked for all the world to see, I imagined all the little white teenage girls in suburban America twerking for the first time, and I said to myself, “God is good!”   I hear crickets from Bill O’Riley’s people.

Oh yeah, and sure like everyone, I saw her ass hanging out of the flesh colored bathing suite, and threw up a little on my mouth, but did I really need to keep that food down?  My trainer and hungry super models would say “no”.   No I didn’t.

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Justin Timberlake: 

My favorite performance of the night.  Simply epic!  Great body of work, great dancing.  The reunion of N’Sync (or Justin and those old guys).

I agree with Kevin Heart, they did looked weathered and that one guy did fart.  Not cool.

Drake performs during the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards in New York

Drake: 

Nice idea, but it was Snoozeville USA for me.  I think he needed to twerk.  Oh yeah, I also feel he has no jaw line.  I just can’t fully connect with someone’s performance when they don’t have a jaw line.

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Kanye West: 

Great Kara Walker-esque performance piece.

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Macklemore & Ryan Lewis: 

A most absurd name for a group, but loved the performance.  He always comes with energy and it was good to hear his words clearly for such an important song.  It was also the first time I’ve seen Jennifer Hudson show restraint.  I bet it’s because she didn’t want to blow the flesh off that other singers bones with her loud harsh notes….and she could do it!

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Bruno Mars: 

Consistently one of the best male singers in the industry.  His performance was extremely good.  I mean, if your not gonna jump around and dance, then damn it! Sing the hell out of the song! Have the band do 6 changes.  Make the background singers do vocal dynamics.  Have the lighting set up of the gods!  Good job Bruno.

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Katy Perry: 

Finally we get to her.  I’ve often though Katy Perry akin to the Ebola virus.  Highly contagious, dangerous, and liquefies organs.  I really like the song “Roar”, but I hate her visuals!

She is beyond corny and serves as an example of what happens when you give non-visual artists a budget and a microphone.  Yet for all her vaunted bullsh*t, Kerry Perry does it big.  It’s never small.  I’ll never say she did too little.  Like when I’m done watching Kerry Perry, I’m glad I don’t own a firearm to put 1 in my head.  I am overwhelmed with her foolishness, which is always better than being underwhelmed!

Ok  beautiful people, that’s my 75 cents.  Thanks and take care

Yo brotha

Ty

P.S.

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I forgot something!  While I usually love the public persona of the Smith family….but last night!? These kids where fucking annoying watch.  See the faces they’re making…that happened all night!

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One thought on “2013 MTV Video Music Awards quick review

  1. This was a great recap!!!

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